Thursday, November 8, 2012

#02 (cont)

Thursday, November 8, 2012 0




Have you ever stop for a while, in your busy days how is it to be someone else? Since I was a little girl, I always have a thought in my mind how is it to be someone else. Weirdly, it is not the healthy, richer person I would like to know, but the poorer, those who doesn't have any shoe to wear, those who have many stories to tell but have no one to listen to and mostly on how is it to be in a crowd of people who never understand how is it to be poor. Well, mostly, my thoughts are referring my life which I feel ashamed to admit. I may have shoe to wear but I don't have cell phone for texting. I may have friends, plenty of them to tell parts of my stories but I loss someone who understand much of my point of view. I may live in a world which are surrounded by poor people, like me, but then I am lost in the world of crowded people that sometimes I forgot how is to be grateful with what I have. 
Why is it we wanted to be someone else? Since I was little, troubles mostly I have is to be able to communicate, to make new friends. So, I learn that some actions, acts attract friends. If you are friendly, you'll get friend, you won't be alone. If you do jokes, some will prefer to spend time with you. If you are clever, some would like you to work with them in a group. If you are pretty more people will come to your life. Be popular and you have a great life. 
Here I am now, 20 years old, looking back for many years I had lived my life trying to be someone else. Why is it? I might say "an adaption towards the surrounding's flexibility." or is because I am ashamed of who am I inside, my background?  I wanted to do jokes so you would like to read my blog, I wanted to post something that attract more reader. But then I learn, it is not your content mostly that attract more reader but how popular you are among people. I've read some none sense blog about a girl telling what she do all day long and hell yes she got hundreds of readers eventhough she is just posting "Today I eat apple pie for breakfast... bla bla bla..bla bla bla.."  And yes, she is one beautiful girl. That influences too. There are some requirement you need to fulfilled to makes you able to get more reader. Mine? I have nothing. I have much thoughts in my mind. My thought don't attract other. So, I am writing for myself. BE ME, BE LONELY. I am reading my own blog because none will do. 
Am I offense? Do I feel sad? HELL NO! Do you think I don't feel glad that I am alone, lonely? This is how I live my life, and I like it. I do interfere with others. I have many friends whom I love so much! And be in a social life doesn't mean you don't feel lonely and alone. There's a time when even you are surrounded by people, you still feel alone, lonely. One great thing about me turning 20 is, I learn, be someone else doesn't mean everything will change the way you wanted it to be. I then find out, it is because I, be me, myself, I had a chance - a chance that I never planned - to be in a relationship with him. It is me being me that attract him to get to know me more. Being with him changes a lot of my perspectives towards life. "Live is your struggle of existence. Do it your way or don't do it."  

What is your first assumption regarding this picture? The man is using his wife's as a scarecrow? How about the man choose it because he feels alone, working all day long in his farm, whose wife is busy in their house which is mile away. By doing so, then he won't feel too lonely, and fell save (yala, ada isteri yang 'garang' jaga tanaman.kompom lari burung n yang pencuri pun takut tingu urang-urang yang ko buat). HAHA.  Who knows kn? It could be that way. 
My point, don't just jump into conclusion. What is custom to you might mean something else to others. Stop for a while and be empathize not by your thought but how others' feel. 

Jam 5 am suda! Bubye.. ~~

Monday, November 5, 2012


Monday, November 5, 2012 4
I may not be The BEST, but I'll do My BEST
~ I could study like hell and end up hell. HAHA. JK. Student's life, studying like hell - or at least that is how I describe "HELL". My course may not be as good as yours but what choice do I have left? Doing my best is the only option left. A little opportunities is better than none at all. Opportunity is everywhere. Kadang-kadang bila saya study, saya rasa saya macam budak2 pandai. Tapi kenyataan. #sedihnya kehidupan.
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